The Scarecrow Invasion 1465-6Edit
Between 1465 and 1466 Boston was invaded by an army of ghoulish, gnarled, horny scarecrows with massive twig dicks, brought to life by a necromancer, which were thwarted by Boston's favourite son Jonathan Holmes. The scarecrows attempted to walk into Boston and twig dick everything after it's founding in 1466. The resident protecting army at that time, 'The Human League' were decimented almost to a man.
Nobely Jonathan Holmes gave a jobbie to every attacking scarecrow to save the surviving members of 'The Human League' defence force. He rested upon his knees and gave a slob job to every birchy member to protect the city and it's citizens.
This event is commemorated by a reenactment with Jonathan Holmes, wearing a suit of armor, at his 'Scarecrow Mayhem' exhibit within his 'Learn about Boston. The Greatest City on Earth-Presented to you by Boston's Favorite son Jonathan Holmes with Conrad and Jim helping a Little Bit' Museum.
Amazing Events and Places in BostonEdit
In the year 2012, Boston has been host to many of Jim Sterling's notorious schemes, these include:
- The Captain Crack Cocaine Elementary School Crackdown
- The Black Dahlia Murderer Reveal (aka. The Sequel to Val Kilmer's Thanksgiving Family Showdown)
- Jonathan Holmes University Of Paedophilia
- Pirate Cove
- War of Independance 2012 (for Jonathan Holmes's Lawn)
- Jim Sterling's Secret Laboratory for Sterling Corp.
- The Mental Hospital Idiot Ball
The people of Boston consider these regular events to be some of the most beloved in the history of the city. Alongside these, Jim Sterling has established a number of businesses in and around the Boston area, such as a zoo, a movie theatre, and an Old West-style saloon/brothel. Boston is also a good place to eat shit for justice.