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Baby jesus

Actual Photo of the Birth of Jesus Christ.

The Birth of Jesus
was widely believed to having been the original reason to celebrate Christmas before we met the Inventor of Christmas. Both events were told by Jim Sterling on Podtoid 232.

Act I: King Heroine is a Bad ManEdit

King Heroine (sometimes referred to King Herodes) was the king of biblical times. He ruled above all men, but only the men, because he was also sexist. One day, he heard the news that a new king would be born, a king named Jesus. Being disgusted and angry about this (because he was a bad man) new possibly baby, he decided to gather two of every animal and place them on a giant Ark.

When he had gathered all his animals, he realized that he also had to build the giant ark, so he placed all the animals in a Maternity Ward across the street from an Inn.

Act II: They Thought it was a BarnEdit

Later, Joseph with the Technicolor Dreamcoat and the pregnant-but-virgin Mary Queen of Scotts is walking down the street looking for an Inn to stay in. They find one and talk to the Innkeeper, asking him if there's any room for them. The Innkeeper yell at them that there are no rooms and that they should just fuck off (Christianity had not invented hospitality yet) before he closed the door.

Joseph assured Mary that as soon as she would pop out the little fucker-parasite inside of her womb everything would be fine, because then they could live on wellfare because of Coco Bama. They see the Materinity Ward across the street and because of all of King Heroine's animals, they mistake it for a barn and decides to stay the night there.

Act III: Long Con and the First Born of ChristmasEdit

Finally as they were staying amongst the animals in the Materinty Ward (that was totally smelling of poo), Mary split apart her legs and dropped out a Baby Jesus. Three Wise Men barged into the room they were staying in and presented the baby with a copy of Sim City, one from every Wise Man. The first born of Christmas had finally been born and people were becoming nice to one and another.

Baby Jesus then turns towards the audience and says; "Give it 30 or so years, and I'll be hanging from a cross because of something Jonathan Holmes did". This was known as the Long Con.

Moral of the StoryEdit

If this happened today, Bill O'Rielly would be on Mary's ass for being a Wellfare whore and Joseph would have left Mary for carrying a "virigin" baby. So the moral of the story is, Christianity doesn't work any more. Which is why we found the true meaning of the Christmas.

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